Samuel Langhorne Clemens, more commonly recognized by his pen name Mark Twain, established himself as an American author, wit, businessperson, publisher, and public speaker. He garnered acclaim as the “preeminent humorist produced by the United States,” while being referred to by William Faulkner as the “pioneer of American literature.” Wikipedia
“A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.” ~ Mark Twain
“Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.” ~ Mark Twain
“There is no sadder thing than a young pessimist, except an old optimist.” ~ Mark Twain
“Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.” ~ Mark Twain
“To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.” ~ Mark Twain
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“I have found out there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.” ~ Mark Twain
“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.” ~ Mark Twain
“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” ~ Mark Twain
“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.” ~ Mark Twain
“A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.” ~ Mark Twain
“Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.” ~ Mark Twain
“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.” ~ Mark Twain
“Life is short, break the rules. Forgive quickly, kiss slowly. Love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that makes you smile.” ~ Mark Twain
“Books are the liberated spirits of men.” ~ Mark Twain
“A full belly is little worth where the mind is starved.” ~ Mark Twain
“Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.” ~ Mark Twain
“The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.” ~ Mark Twain
“Humor is mankind’s greatest blessing.” ~ Mark Twain
“Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.” ~ Mark Twain
“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.” ~ Mark Twain
“Nothing so needs reforming as other people’s habits.” ~ Mark Twain
“Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it.” ~ Mark Twain
“Loyalty to country, always. Loyalty to the government, when it deserves it.” ~ Mark Twain
“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” ~ Mark Twain
“Classic—a book which people praise and don’t read.” ~ Mark Twain
“Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.” ~ Mark Twain
“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform—or pause and reflect.” ~ Mark Twain
“Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.” ~ Mark Twain
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” ~ Mark Twain
“The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.” ~ Mark Twain
“I was born modest, but it didn’t last.” ~ Mark Twain
“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” ~ Mark Twain
“Give every day the chance to become the most beautiful of your life.” ~ Mark Twain
“Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.” ~ Mark Twain
“The only very marked difference between the average civilized man and the average savage is that the one is gilded and the other is painted.” ~ Mark Twain
“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” ~ Mark Twain
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“When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.” ~ Mark Twain
“It liberates the vandal to travel—you never saw a bigoted, opinionated, stubborn, narrow-minded, self-conceited, almighty mean man in your life but he had stuck in one place since he was born and thought God made the world and dyspepsia and bile for his especial comfort and satisfaction.” ~ Mark Twain
“Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.” ~ Mark Twain
“What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth.” ~ Mark Twain
“I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.” ~ Mark Twain
“With courage, you will dare to take risks, have the strength to be compassionate, and the wisdom to be humble. Courage is the foundation of integrity.” ~ Mark Twain
“All good things arrive unto them that wait and don’t die in the meantime.” ~ Mark Twain
“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.” ~ Mark Twain
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.” ~ Mark Twain
“When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.” ~ Mark Twain
“Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.” ~ Mark Twain
“The secret of success is making your vocation your vacation.” ~ Mark Twain
“Laughter without a tinge of philosophy is but a sneeze of humor. Genuine humor is replete with wisdom.” ~ Mark Twain
“The funniest things are the forbidden.” ~ Mark Twain
“Education—the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.” ~ Mark Twain
“The lack of money is the root of all evil.” ~ Mark Twain
“Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; the truth isn’t.” ~ Mark Twain
“You can’t reason with your heart; it has its own laws and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.” ~ Mark Twain
“Always obey your parents when they are present.” ~ Mark Twain
“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you, too, can become great.” ~ Mark Twain
“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.” ~ Mark Twain
“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” ~ Mark Twain
“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” ~ Mark Twain
“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.” ~ Mark Twain
“Clothes do not merely make the man; clothes are the man.” ~ Mark Twain
“If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.” ~ Mark Twain
“Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.” ~ Mark Twain
“Do the thing you fear most, and the death of fear is certain.” ~ Mark Twain
“If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re misinformed.” ~ Mark Twain
“God created war so that Americans would learn geography.” ~ Mark Twain
“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done the day after tomorrow just as well.” ~ Mark Twain
“I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one.” ~ Mark Twain
“What do we call love, hate, charity, revenge, humanity, forgiveness? Different results of the master impulse—the necessity of securing one’s self-approval.” ~ Mark Twain
“The man with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.” ~ Mark Twain