Robin Williams

“It’s cheaper to keep her.” ~ Robin Williams

“Seize the day. Make your life extraordinary.” ~ Robin Williams

“With a bike you go from zero to a hundred in terms of mobility.” ~ Robin Williams

“Comedy can be a cathartic way to deal with personal trauma.” ~ Robin Williams

“I stand upon my desk to remind myself that we must constantly look at things in a different way.” ~ Robin Williams

“I want everyone out there in TV land to touch the TV. Touch the back of the TV and get a shock for Jesus.” ~ Robin Williams

“My childhood was really nice. My parents never forced me to do anything; it was always, “If you want to do that, fine.” When I told my father I was going to be an actor, he said, “Fine, but study welding just in case.”” ~ Robin Williams

“You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you’ll win, no matter what the outcome.” ~ Robin Williams

“I’m a very tolerant man, except when it comes to holding a grudge.” ~ Robin Williams

“I couldn’t imagine living the way I used to live. Now people come up to me from the drug days and go, ‘Hi, remember me?’ And I’m going, ‘No, did I have sex with you? Did I take a dump in your tool box?’” ~ Robin Williams

“Three wishes – no substitutes, exchanges or refunds.” ~ Robin Williams

“Politics is so personal, vicious and immediate, how are you going to get anything done? Even the local politics where I live have gotten so ugly.” ~ Robin Williams

“Being in the same room with people and creating something together is a good thing.” ~ Robin Williams

“Women are wonderful. They’re amazing creatures. You can never learn enough! They’re addicting in the most amazing sense.” ~ Robin Williams

“You might say he was one taco short of a combination platter.” ~ Robin Williams

“All the new people you meet, it’s pretty amazing. The vampire needs new blood. And there is still a lot to learn and there is always great stuff out there. Even mistakes can be wonderful.” ~ Robin Williams

“You have an internal critic, an internal drive that says, ‘OK, you can do more.’ Maybe that’s what keeps you going.” ~ Robin Williams

“I always wanted to play a big, black man, but that would cost too much make-up.” ~ Robin Williams

“I was once on a German talk show, and this woman said to me, ‘Mr. Williams, why do you think there is not so much comedy in Germany?’ And I said, ‘Did you ever think you killed all the funny people?’” ~ Robin Williams

“Go pump some neurons. Expand your craniums.” ~ Robin Williams

“Improv. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t, but when it does, it’s like open-field running.” ~ Robin Williams

“I feel like I’m a big human snot.” ~ Robin Williams

“Ballet: men wearing pants so tight that you can tell what religion they are.” ~ Robin Williams

“There’s no shame in failing. The only shame is not giving things your best shot.” ~ Robin Williams

“To be acknowledged for who and what I am, no more, no less. Not for acclaim, not for approval, but, the simple truth of that recognition. This has been the elemental drive of my existence, and it must be achieved, if I am to live or die with dignity.” ~ Robin Williams

“I had sex with a prostitute when I was 21, I was so bad, she gave me a refund.” ~ Robin Williams

“Humor is a great defense, and an offense too. Usually the recipient isn’t too happy about it, but the people around are laughing.” ~ Robin Williams

“Taking Viagra after open heart surgery is like a Civil War re-enactment with live ammo. Not good.” ~ Robin Williams

“If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.” ~ Robin Williams

“I always thought the idea of education was to learn to think for yourself.” ~ Robin Williams

“Carpe Diem, everyday!!!” ~ Robin Williams

“If we’re going to fight a disease, let’s fight one of the most terrible diseases of all, indifference.” ~ Robin Williams

“A human life is just a heartbeat in heaven.” ~ Robin Williams

“The meek may inherit the earth, but they don’t get in to Harvard.” ~ Robin Williams

“Most of all, I want to thank my father, up there, the man who when I said I wanted to be an actor, he said, ‘Wonderful. Just have a back-up profession like welding.’” ~ Robin Williams

“The things we fear the most have already happened to us.” ~ Robin Williams

“Be prepared for luck.” ~ Robin Williams

“Women are incredibly intuitive. If anybody on the planet is going to evolve to the next level, that telekinetic thing, women will.” ~ Robin Williams

“Kid, if You Need Booze or Drugs to Enjoy Your Life to the Fullest, You’re Doing It Wrong.” ~ Robin Williams

“The Russians love Brooke Shields because her eyebrows remind them of Leonid Brezhnev.” ~ Robin Williams

“No man is an island; but some are peninsulas.” ~ Robin Williams

“Carpe Diem! Make your lives extraordinary.” ~ Robin Williams

“When you create you get a little endorphin rush. Why do you think Einstein looked like that?” ~ Robin Williams

“I was a serious method actor until I visited this site.” ~ Robin Williams

“Even mistakes can be wonderful.” ~ Robin Williams

“My children give me a great sense of wonder. Just to see them develop into these extraordinary human beings.” ~ Robin Williams

“There are no rules. Just follow your heart.” ~ Robin Williams

“I used food to make myself feel better, but I felt worse when I ate.” ~ Robin Williams

“Look at the walls of Pompeii. That’s what got the internet started.” ~ Robin Williams

“I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you.” ~ Robin Williams

“You’re going to the cemetery with your toothbrush. How Egyptian.” ~ Robin Williams

“On stage you’re free. You can say and do things that if you said and did any place else, you’d be arrested.” ~ Robin Williams

“Do you get the feeling with Sarah Palin, in high school, she was voted least likely to write a book and most likely to burn one?” ~ Robin Williams

“2020. There’ll be cold fusion. We’ll actually be able to power our cars with our own feces. That’s right. The emissions problem will be a little intense, but just light a match.” ~ Robin Williams

“I try to make sense of things. Which is why, I guess, I believe in destiny. There must be a reason that I am as I am. There must be.” ~ Robin Williams

“Avoid using the word ‘very’ because it’s lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don’t use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason boys – to woo women – and in that endeavor, laziness will not do.” ~ Robin Williams

“Keith Richards is the only man who can make the Osbournes look Amish.” ~ Robin Williams

“If you want to die, don’t make a mistake and not quite kill yourself because the medical bills in America are hideous.” ~ Robin Williams

“Cricket is basically baseball on valium.” ~ Robin Williams

“What is this demilitarized zone? Whatever it is, I like it! Gets you on your toes better than a strong cup of cappuccino.” ~ Robin Williams

“Terrible wars have been fought where millions have died for one idea – freedom. And it seems that something that means so much to so many people would be worth having.” ~ Robin Williams

“Texting and driving at the same time is like jerking off and juggling at the same time. Too many balls in the air, if you catch my drift.” ~ Robin Williams

“Never go to Pluto, it’s a Mickey Mouse planet.” ~ Robin Williams

“The only weapon we have is comedy.” ~ Robin Williams

“When I’m riding my bicycle I feel like a Buddhist who is happy just to enjoy his mundane existence.” ~ Robin Williams

“You have to break in half to love somebody.” ~ Robin Williams

“I’m history! No, I’m mythology! Nah, I don’t care what I am, I’m free!” ~ Robin Williams

“I like my wine like my women – ready to pass out.” ~ Robin Williams

“But only in their dreams can men be truly free. It was always thus and always thus will be.” ~ Robin Williams

“I learned that by being entertaining you make a connection with another person.” ~ Robin Williams

“You know what music is – a harmonic connection between all living beings.” ~ Robin Williams

“My mother’s idea of natural childbirth was giving birth without makeup. She was hyper-positive – the world is a wonderful place, rainbows and unicorns. If you said anything contrary to her, you were basically exiled.” ~ Robin Williams

“I do believe in love; it’s wonderful – especially love third time around, it’s even more precious; it’s kind of amazing.” ~ Robin Williams

“It’s hotter than a snake’s ass in a wagon rut.” ~ Robin Williams

“All it takes is a beautiful fake smile to hide an injured soul.” ~ Robin Williams

“You don’t need cocaine! There’s another way to get real high, and really mess your mind up, it’s called marathon running!” ~ Robin Williams

“In England, if you commit a crime, the police don’t have a gun and you don’t have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say ‘Stop, or I’ll say stop again.’” ~ Robin Williams

“Don’t associate yourself with toxic people. It’s better to be alone and love yourself than surrounded by people that make you hate yourself.” ~ Robin Williams

“Self-reliance is the key to a vigorous life. A man must look inward to find his own answers.” ~ Robin Williams

“If it’s the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?” ~ Robin Williams

“The truth is, if anything, I’m probably addicted to laughter.” ~ Robin Williams

“Sometimes it’s more noble to tell a small lie than to deliver a painful truth.” ~ Robin Williams

“Gentiles are people who eat mayonnaise for no reason.” ~ Robin Williams

“My battles with addiction definitely shaped how I am now. They really made me deeply appreciate human contact. And the value of friends and family, how precious that is.” ~ Robin Williams

“Our job is improving the quality of life, not just delaying death.” ~ Robin Williams

“I don’t practice anything. I spend time looking over ideas and then just get out and do it.” ~ Robin Williams

“I had to stop drinking alcohol because I used to wake up nude in front of my car with my keys in my ass.” ~ Robin Williams

“Whenever a big white man picks up a banjo, my cheeks tighten.” ~ Robin Williams

“It never fails – you get in the bath and there’s a rub at the lamp.” ~ Robin Williams

“My favorite thing to do is ride a bicycle. I ride road bikes. And for me, it’s mobile meditation.” ~ Robin Williams

“Make your life spectacular, I know I did.” ~ Robin Williams

“We have a president for whom English is a second language. He’s like ‘We have to get rid of dictators,’ but he’s pretty much one himself.” ~ Robin Williams

“Gradual school is where you go to school and you gradually find out you don’t want to go to school anymore.” ~ Robin Williams

“You can do anything you want. You are bound by nothing.” ~ Robin Williams

“Canadian money is also called the loony. How can you take an economic crisis seriously?” ~ Robin Williams

“In the dictionary under redundant it says see redundant.” ~ Robin Williams

“Sometimes you can have a whole lifetime in a day and never notice that this is a beautiful as it gets.” ~ Robin Williams

“There was an old, crazy dude who used to live a long time ago. His name was Lord Buckley. And he said, a long time ago, he said, ‘People – they’r e kinda like flowers, and it’s been a privilege walking in your garden.’ My love goes with you.” ~ Robin Williams

“No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world.” ~ Robin Williams

“Death – to blink for an exceptionally long period of time.” ~ Robin Williams

“You’d think all of these “atypical” somethings would add up to a typical something.” ~ Robin Williams

“Nobody takes a picture of something they want to forget.” ~ Robin Williams

“But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for.” ~ Robin Williams

“As an alcoholic, you will violate your standards quicker than you can lower them.” ~ Robin Williams

“I used to think the worst thing in life is to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.” ~ Robin Williams

“You have this idea that you’d better keep working otherwise people will forget. And that was dangerous. And then you realize, no, actually if you take a break people might be more interested in you.” ~ Robin Williams

“All you have to do is think one happy thought, and you’ll fly like me.” ~ Robin Williams

“We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race.” ~ Robin Williams

“You know what music is? God’s little reminder that there’s something else besides us in this universe; harmonic connection between all living beings, every where, even the stars.” ~ Robin Williams

“We’ve had cloning in the South for years. It’s called cousins.” ~ Robin Williams

“Shakespeare said, “Kill all the lawyers.” There were no agents then.” ~ Robin Williams

“They’re talking about partial nuclear disarmament, which is also like talking about partial circumcision – you either go all the way or forget it.” ~ Robin Williams

“You’re still young. Being a true loser takes years of inaptitude.” ~ Robin Williams

“Comedy is there to basically show us we fart, we laugh, to make us realize we still are part animal.” ~ Robin Williams

“The sort of liveliness which increases with age is not far distant from madness.” ~ Robin Williams

“I don’t do well with snakes and I can’t dance.” ~ Robin Williams

“And some people say Jesus wasn’t Jewish. Of COURSE he was Jewish! 30 years old, single, lives with his parents, come on! He works in his father’s business, his mom thought he was God’s gift, he’s Jewish! Give it up!” ~ Robin Williams

“Is it rude to Twitter during sex? To go “omg, omg, wtf, zzz”? Is that rude?” ~ Robin Williams

“Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you are making too much money.” ~ Robin Williams

“Explore an idea until you’ve exhausted it, really go to all the different parameters of it.” ~ Robin Williams

“Comedy is acting out optimism.” ~ Robin Williams

“Sometimes you got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It’s called fun.” ~ Robin Williams

“They say our mothers really know how to push our buttons – because they installed them.” ~ Robin Williams

“Seize the day. Because, believe it or not, each and every one of us in this room is one day going to stop breathing, turn cold, and die.” ~ Robin Williams

“Sucking the marrow out of life doesn’t mean choking on the bone.” ~ Robin Williams

“What’s true in our minds is true, whether some people know it or not.” ~ Robin Williams

“You need a touch of madness, just enough that you don’t become stupid!” ~ Robin Williams

“Carpe per diem – seize the check.” ~ Robin Williams

“Clouds are like boogers hanging on the nostrils of the moon.” ~ Robin Williams

“It’s always great when you want scientific fact to get a really good science fiction writer to talk to you about it.” ~ Robin Williams

“You’re only given a little spark of madness. Don’t lose it.” ~ Robin Williams

“I only ever play Vegas one night at a time.” ~ Robin Williams

“People say satire is dead. It’s not dead; it’s alive and living in the White House.” ~ Robin Williams

“You will have bad times, but they will always wake you up to the stuff you weren’t paying attention to.” ~ Robin Williams

“Friends come in all sizes, take it from me! Golly gee, size doesn’t matter, when you want some friendly patter from a pal who is true.” ~ Robin Williams

“Don’t mess with me, man, I’m a lawyer!” ~ Robin Williams

“Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party.” ~ Robin Williams

“Reality is just a crutch for people who can’t cope with drugs.” ~ Robin Williams

“There are times when life’s just real quiet and simple. I sometimes get tired of people saying, “Well, what are you really like?”” ~ Robin Williams

“I play a lot of computer games. I love computer graphics. I’ve had Pixar in me for a long time.” ~ Robin Williams

“Okra is the closest thing to nylon I’ve ever eaten. It’s like they bred cotton with a green bean. Okra, tastes like snot. The more you cook it, the more it turns into string.” ~ Robin Williams

“There’s three things in this world that you need: Respect for all kinds of life, a nice bowel movement on a regular basis, and a navy blazer.” ~ Robin Williams

“It’s a wonderful feeling when your father becomes not a god but a man to you – when he comes down from the mountain and you see he’s this man with weaknesses. And you love him as this whole being, not as a figurehead.” ~ Robin Williams

“If you listen real close, you can hear them whisper their legacy to you. Go on, lean in. Listen, you hear it? Carpe diem, seize the day boys, make your lives extraordinary.” ~ Robin Williams

“The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, ‘Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.’ She’s got a baseball bat and yelling, ‘You want a piece of me?’” ~ Robin Williams

“See what I mean? You gotta be crazy. Ain’t no time to be sane.” ~ Robin Williams

“Dreams don’t deal in time. Time doesn’t count.” ~ Robin Williams

“I know size can be daunting but don’t be afraid.” ~ Robin Williams

“In America, they really do mythologize people when they die.” ~ Robin Williams

“The Chinese had accused the Tibetans of being terrorists, which is weird. A Tibetan terrorist is like an Amish hacker. It just doesn’t fit.” ~ Robin Williams

“The French don’t have a baseball team. And if they did, there’d only be a left field, and no one would be safe.” ~ Robin Williams

“Women! Can’t live with ’em, can’t live with ’em!” ~ Robin Williams

“For a while you get mad, then you get over it.” ~ Robin Williams

“Cocaine for me was a place to hide. Most people get hyper on coke. It slowed me down. Sometimes it made me paranoid and impotent, but mostly it just made me withdrawn.” ~ Robin Williams

“I went to rehab for alcoholism in wine country, just to keep my options open.” ~ Robin Williams

“I stopped drinking when I had children because I wanted to be awake and aware. I did not want to be going, you know, daddy loves you and then drop my head on the table. I do not want to miss anything that they do or say. It is important to me.” ~ Robin Williams

“We used to be hunter-gatherers, now we’re shopper-borrowers.” ~ Robin Williams

“Stand-up is the place where you can do things that you could never do in public. Once you step on stage you’re licensed to do that. It’s an understood relationship. You walk on stage – it’s your job.” ~ Robin Williams

“Real loss is only possible when you love something more than you love yourself.” ~ Robin Williams

“If you’re going to do a movie about the Village, it’s pretty nice to shoot in the village and not be in Toronto.” ~ Robin Williams

“The little idiosyncrasies that only I know about: that’s what made her my wife. Oh she had the goods on me too, she knew all my little peccadilloes. People call these things imperfections, but they’re not. Ah, that’s the good stuff!” ~ Robin Williams

“If you don’t keep pushing the limits, you wake up one day and you’re the “center square to block.”” ~ Robin Williams

“My favorite is when you go to Afghanistan and you meet the special forces guys, and they look like these heavily armed surfers. These guys are the best. You see guys dressed as full Afghans, but then wearing a Yankees hat.” ~ Robin Williams

“Spring is nature’s way of saying, ‘Let’s party!’” ~ Robin Williams

“We were romantics. We didn’t just read poetry. We let it drip from our tongues like honey. Spirits soared. Women swooned, and gods were created, gentlemen. Not a bad way to spend an evening, eh?” ~ Robin Williams

“My father retired to San Francisco, and I got a chance to know him and be around him. It’s always been someplace where everything changed for the better. It’s always been a home for me.” ~ Robin Williams

“Stand-up is the place where you can do things that you could never do in public.” ~ Robin Williams

“We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.” ~ Robin Williams

“There’s a world out there. Open a window, and it’s there.” ~ Robin Williams

“It was kind of a decompression – from straight alcohol to mixed drinks to wine to spritzers – and then you’re out.” ~ Robin Williams

“Anything that is not funny at a certain point will be funny.” ~ Robin Williams

“What kind of man gives cigarettes to trees.” ~ Robin Williams

“My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist.” ~ Robin Williams

“Please, don’t worry so much. Because in the end, none of us have very long on this Earth. Life is fleeting.” ~ Robin Williams

“Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it.” ~ Robin Williams

“The great thing about marriage is the idea of really getting to know someone. And really getting to know a woman is a life long task.” ~ Robin Williams

“Mickey Mouse to a three-year-old is a six-foot-tall RAT!” ~ Robin Williams

“Crying never helped anybody do anything, okay? You have a problem you face it like a man.” ~ Robin Williams

“The idea of having a steady job is appealing.” ~ Robin Williams

“Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they’ve got nothing to lose.” ~ Robin Williams

“It’s frightening and exhilarating. It’s like combat. Look at the metaphors: You kill when it works; you die when it doesn’t.” ~ Robin Williams

“We get to choose who we let in to our weird little worlds.” ~ Robin Williams

“The entire world will be in nuclear war, and only the Swiss will be going, ‘what’s that noise?’” ~ Robin Williams

“The human spirit is more powerful than any drug and THAT is what needs to be nourished: with work, play, friendship, family. THESE are the things that matter.” ~ Robin Williams

“I’m looking for Miss Right, or at least Miss Right Now.” ~ Robin Williams

“Good people end up in Hell because they can’t forgive themselves.” ~ Robin Williams

“If heaven exists, to know that there’s laughs, that would be a great thing…” ~ Robin Williams

“Death is nature’s way of saying, ’your table is ready.” ~ Robin Williams

“Change is not popular; we are creatures of habit as human beings. ‘I want it to be the way it was.’ But if you continue the way it was there will be no ‘is.’” ~ Robin Williams

“Come on now! You kick out the gooks, the next thing you know, you have to kick out the chinks, the spicks, the spooks, the kikes and all that’s going to be left is a couple of brain-dead rednecks.” ~ Robin Williams

“The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery.” ~ Robin Williams

“If you can remember the sixties, you weren’t there.” ~ Robin Williams

“I love kids, but they are a tough audience.” ~ Robin Williams

“If there was a pill that allowed you to drink and not get drunk, an alcoholic would go What happens if you take two?” ~ Robin Williams

“Being a functioning alcoholic is kind of like being a paraplegic lap dancer – you can do it, just not as well as the others, really.” ~ Robin Williams

“Men may have wars, but women have their period. Men go off and kill each other, but women say nasty things, which is even better.” ~ Robin Williams

“How much more can you give? Other than, literally, open-heart surgery onstage? Not much. But the only cure you have right now is the honesty of going, this is who you are. I know who I am.” ~ Robin Williams

“If we were interested in making money, we wouldn’t have become teachers.” ~ Robin Williams

“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” ~ Robin Williams

“We’re not laughing at you – we’re laughing near you.” ~ Robin Williams

“Reality: What a concept!” ~ Robin Williams

“I think it’s great when stories are dark and strange and weirdly personal.” ~ Robin Williams

“Compassionate conservative, that’s like having a gun rack on a Volvo.” ~ Robin Williams

“When you look at Prince Charles, don’t you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?” ~ Robin Williams

“When I was growing up they used to say, “Robin, drugs can kill you.” Now that I’m 58 my doctor’s telling me, “Robin, you need drugs to live.” I realize now that my doctor is also my dealer…” ~ Robin Williams

“What some folks call impossible is just stuff they haven’t seen before.” ~ Robin Williams

“When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker.” ~ Robin Williams

“Divorce is expensive. I used to joke they were going to call it ‘all the money,’ but they changed it to ‘alimony.’ It’s ripping your heart out through your wallet.” ~ Robin Williams

“Just now when I said, “I have a crush on you,” you didn’t say, “no way loser”. I’d rather have a lobotomy by a leper. That means something.” ~ Robin Williams

“I love being backstage, or doing littler things like Blame Canada.” ~ Robin Williams

“Mr. Keating: Carpe Diem! Sieze the day!” ~ Robin Williams

“Boys, you must strive to find your own voice, because the longer you wait to begin the less likely you are to find it at all.” ~ Robin Williams

“In down times I do things like go for a long bike ride or run. The other thing I’m doing in that quiet time is just observing.” ~ Robin Williams

“Being a famous print journalist is like being the best-dressed woman on radio.” ~ Robin Williams

“If I ever asked you about love, you’d probably quote me a sonnet. But you’ve never looked a woman and been totally vulnerable.” ~ Robin Williams

“When the Williams sisters play tennis, it gets pretty hot. When they start grunting, I’m in.” ~ Robin Williams

“I don’t have a college degree, and my father didn’t have a college degree, so when my son, Zachary, graduated from college, I said, “My boy’s got learnin’!”” ~ Robin Williams

“You appreciate little things, like walks on the beach with a defibrillator.” ~ Robin Williams

“She is not perfect. You are not perfect. The question is whether or not you are perfect for each other.” ~ Robin Williams

“Gentlemen, haven’t we learned anything from the music of John Lennon? All we need is love.” ~ Robin Williams

“Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures.” ~ Robin Williams

“There’s a time for daring and there’s a time for caution, and a wise man understands which is called for.” ~ Robin Williams

“I met Jonah Lomu. I never knew how huge he was. I felt like a peasant in a Godzilla movie. ‘Quickly! Tell the other villagers! We go now!’” ~ Robin Williams

“Freud: If it’s not one thing, it’s your mother.” ~ Robin Williams

“If these pictures have anything important to say to future generations, it’s this… I was here! I existed! I was young, I was happy, and someone cared enough about me in this world… to take my picture.” ~ Robin Williams

“Some are born great. Some achieve greatness. Some get it as a graduation gift.” ~ Robin Williams

“If you’re that depressed, reach out to someone. And remember, suicide is a permanent solution, to a temporary problem.” ~ Robin Williams

“I’m an Episcopal, which is Catholic Lite. It’s like same religion, half the guilt.” ~ Robin Williams

“A woman wouldn’t make a bomb that kills you. A woman would make a bomb that makes you feel bad for a while. That’s why there should be a woman President. There’d never be any wars, just every twenty-eight days there’d be very intense negotiations.” ~ Robin Williams

“I was an only child. I did have kind of like a lonely existence.” ~ Robin Williams

“If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus.” ~ Robin Williams

“People say that I’m a tree hugger, but I do a lot more than hug trees. I like having my drinking water without faecal matter, that’s really nice. Or acceptable levels of strychnine. I’m an air breather, I’ve gotten used to that over the years.” ~ Robin Williams

“Being alone onstage is like legalized insanity.” ~ Robin Williams

“I thought lacrosse was what you find in la church.” ~ Robin Williams

“You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing! Someone is losing a trailer.” ~ Robin Williams

“That’s the formaldehyde. That’s why Granny’s so well-preserved.” ~ Robin Williams

“What’s right is what’s left if you do everything else wrong.” ~ Robin Williams

“You’re best when you’re not in charge. The ego locks the muse.” ~ Robin Williams

“A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills, no, no. They’d make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while.” ~ Robin Williams